Daddy (Flash Fiction)

Daddy (Flash Fiction)

by Joe Mynhardt
(Bloemfontein, South Africa)

“Help!” A man stumbled from the lake – soaked and out of breath. “My little girl is still in the car. Please help.”

Witnesses stormed forward as the last remnants of oxygen bubbled to the surface.

“My baby.” The man collapsed onto the ground and coughed up water. He dug his fingers into his hair. “Dear God, please don’t let her die."

More bystanders pushed past him to get a better view.

He crawled through the onlookers toward the edge of the lake and buried his fist in the sand. He appealed to them. “Hurry! Please. Why aren’t you helping?”

People screamed and pointed in chaos. A few wandered into the icy water, yet only one man dove in.

A few seconds later he burst through to the surface with a little blonde girl cradled in his arms. He fell to his knees on the beach and began CPR. Her little body shook with every jolt to the chest until she spewed water from her lungs.

“Oh, thank God…she’s alright,” he said. “The father is still in the car. He didn’t make it.”

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Daddy (Flash Fiction)

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Jul 30, 2010

Thank you
by: Joe Mynhardt

Thanks to everyone who enjoyed my story. I've set up my own website at Joemynhardt.com if anyone would like to read more of my work.

Thanks again to Pearl Luke for all her help.

Mar 14, 2010

Good flash!
by: Ravenne

Hi Joe,

I enjoyed this flash fiction. It's sharp. The essence is there as is the impact.

nicely done!

Laurel

Feb 02, 2010

Daddy
by: Raven Madison

I just read your short story. It was moving and made my breath catch at the end. Great story in such few words.

Jan 30, 2010

Reply to Rehash.
by: Joe Mynhardt

Thanks for the replies everyone. Rehash, the version you read was the original. I had to
change it according to the publishing guidelines
and preferences of this site.

Jan 30, 2010

Rehash?
by: Anonymous

My comment should be ignored. I have changed over the months, not the story. Thanks to this, I've learned about myself. Still a great and moving story.

Jan 30, 2010

rehash?
by: Anonymous

I remember reading this story before, about five or six months ago. The version I read was more moving, had a smoother delivery and a less 'jagged' scene description. The essence of the story is very moving, but why are there two versions?

Jan 30, 2010

Great job
by: Efs Chromium

Joe, great job with the story and keep writing.
Best to you, Efs.

Jan 30, 2010

Great job
by: Patti

Wow! All that in such a few words. Great writing.

Sep 28, 2009

What an impact
by: David

Wow!
The last sentence literally sent a shiver down my spine and brought tears to my eyes.
This is writing at an emotional level. Well done.

Sep 06, 2009

Well Done!!
by: Sulette Gardiner

Congratulations Joe! Good story!

Aug 27, 2009

Excellent Read!
by: Tina (Chaucer)

A riveting little story you've created here Joe. Well done!

Aug 10, 2009

COOL
by: MATTHYS DU TOIT

Flippen well done....
let us know when the next one is coming.

Best of luck

Matthys

Aug 10, 2009

Awsome stuff!
by: Dawid Blaauw

Well done Joe,

What a excellent story...still as good as the first time read it.

I see BIG things for you in future!

All the best dude.

Aug 05, 2009

Great
by: Laura

Wonderful story... I really enjoyed it!

Aug 01, 2009

feeling
by: Denise

Emotional Endowment. Something a parent knows.

Jul 29, 2009

STANNING
by: ousus Jenny Mynhardt

Stanning my boetie...so trots op jou...liefde uit Namibia jou ousus Jenny

Jul 29, 2009

brilliant
by: Anonymous

Joe, Your story is brilliant. Keep on doing what you are doing.........You are going to make it big in life!!!!!

Hope to see more of you!!!!!!